Response

Sleep is the closest a man can get to death. For some reason when Wen Desi slowly woke up from his long dream, this sentence popped into his mind. He opened his bleary eyes and took in his surroundings. A light red curtain was swaying gently, and embroidered into the fabric were waterweed patterns. A delicate fragrance permeated the room. He felt so comfortable, and closed his eyes to enjoy the quiet—before suddenly startling awake. Where was he?

If Wen Zong hadn’t experienced the wormhole, he would have thought that he had really transmigrated to another world. He shook his head and some clarity returned: wasn’t he staying in the residence that Gao Ju had gifted them? Although the bed there had a curtain, it was just ordinary blue fabric. And also, how come there was that fragrance filling the room? Where on earth was he?

He hurriedly sat up, but this action only made him dizzy. His limbs were all sore, and he felt completely drained of strength. Looking around, he found that the room was very small and had no windows. Apart from the big bed under him, there was only a single table and chair in the room, upon which a vase and a bonsai pot were placed. On the wall to the left and right were hung two shan shui landscape paintings.

He quickly stood up and put on his clothes. However, he discovered that his stab vest, belt, and waterproof boots were gone. And even the knife, stun gun and wolf spray that he kept in his pockets had disappeared. This made him very anxious. As a “survival madman” of many years, these items were Wen Desi’s magic weapons for self-defence. Now that he was in a precarious situation, these treasures were somehow nowhere to be seen…

Just as he was panicking about what to do, the door creaked open and a thin, moderately built man entered. His face was emanating an aura of hostility. Wen Zong knew at first glance that this visitor was not a good person. However, he was unclear about the current situation, so he simply kept silent.

“Hello Shopkeeper Wen.” The visitor greeted in an exaggerated motion, revealing the handle of the wakizashi^[1] strapped around his waist. Whether this was intentional or unintentional Wen Desi did not know. Wen Desi focused on the man’s accent; it sounded like something from southern Fujian.

“May I know who you are?”

The man laughed and sat down on the chair: “We make a living on the sea. Recently, I heard that Owner Wen came from Australia, and made a fortune by selling strange goods. So I wonder, where is your ship docked, and what is the route you took to sail here? After all, me and my brothers are concerned for your safety at sea.”

Wen Desi did not answer, and only persisted: “Where am I?”

The man laughed: “This place is just where the respected Shopkeeper is staying temporarily, why do you need to know where it is? On the other hand, we are very curious about this place called Australia. I hope that you can enlighten us.” After saying this, he looked menacingly at Wen Desi.

Chief Wen thought, you are such a skinny and shrivelled guy, how could I be afraid of you? He wanted to beat this guy up, but his hands and feet were still so weak that he could hardly move at all. A wise man does not fight when the odds are stacked against him,^[2] so he responded: “I can tell you about it. But what do you want to hear about?”

The man leaned in. “What ship did you take to come to the Great Ming, and where is this ship moored right now?”

Wen Desi was the most afraid of this question, because there was no easy way to explain it. It would be difficult to make up a lie that could withstand even a cursory investigation. Since there had never been an Australian ship, the only way was to push responsibility onto a ship that actually existed.

“The ships built in Australia are not suitable for long-distance voyages, so we only sailed on them to Borneo. At Borneo we transferred to Portuguese ships.” This statement was difficult to verify, and Boss Wang could not refute him on the spot. But his interrogation continued

“How did you get into Guangzhou city?”

In an instant, several possible ideas flitted through Wen Desi’s mind. Since these people had kidnapped him, they were obviously not on Gao Ju’s side, and in fact, they might even be enemies of Gao Ju. The best course of action for him now was to entangle his backstory with Gao Ju, such that these people would not be able to easily verify his story, and so he wouldn’t be exposed. He immediately went through everything that Xiao Zishan had told him about the smugglers on Haopan Street. After forming an outline in his head, he said:

“Back in Australia we heard from overseas merchants that Guangzhou in the Great Ming was rich and powerful, but outsiders were not allowed to enter the city to trade. By coincidence, we learned from a Portuguese sailor that there was a place called Youyuzhou outside the mouth of the Pearl River which was a good spot for foreign merchants to smuggle in goods. We alighted there, and paid someone to take us into Guangzhou. That person took us to Gao Ju’s residence.”

“Interesting. What was that person’s name?”

“We are new to these lands, so we didn’t dare to ask more. He seemed to be surnamed Wang.”^[3]

Old Wang on Youyuzhou was just a random character he heard by chance from the mouth of one of Gao’s servants.

“Huh, then how come Old Wang said that he’d never seen any Australian merchants?” A clear and charming voice of a woman suddenly came from outside the door.

As soon as the voice finished speaking, a young girl entered. She was wearing a lotus-coloured form-fitting jacket^[4] on top and a snow-blue pleated long skirt on the bottom. She was tall, with curved eyebrows and plush lips, and her skin was as white as jade. Her eyes were big and bright, and when she spoke they moved around charmingly. Looking closely however, she had a hint of evil in her pupils.

Boss Wang seemed to be very deferential to this girl, and hurriedly stood up to yield the seat to her with a flattering smile. The girl wasn’t polite and sat down gracefully. Her pair of charming eyes wandered around Wen Des’s chest as if they could see his heart directly. Wen Desi’s heart palpitated. What did this girl want to do? How did such a person come from the 17th century Ming Dynasty?

“You are…?” Wen Desi was disarmed by her interjection. He knew that it would be far too easy to make a mistake if he continued speaking and tried to defend himself with this girl around, so he first tried to delay.

“Shut up, that has nothing to do with you!”

“Boss Wang, don’t say that. I’m not a bad person. I’m even quite well-known on the sea. So why hide? I am Li Siya—” She stood up, lifted the hem of her skirt, bent her right foot back, and bowed.^[5] Wen Zong’s mind buzzed, could this girl also be a time traveller? In addition to their group, were there other time travellers in this world?!”

He calmed down. Such speculation wasn’t productive. He stood up, and bowed formally. “I am Wen Desi.”

This time it was Li Siya’s turn to be slightly astonished: “Australia also follows Western etiquette?”

Wen Desi saw that the girl’s hair and pupils both carried a light shade of brown, and the hair was also slightly curly on the ends. The girl was probably of Portuguese descent. Such second-generation children born to Portuguese parents were very common in Macau. The exchange they had was just a part of Western etiquette. Wen Desi smiled slightly:

“Western etiquette is observed in Australia.”

“But you still call yourself Chinese? Isn’t that just completely trampling over our heritage?”^[6] The girl teased.

“We are Chinese people because our hearts belong to China. It has nothing to do with customs or etiquette.”

“My, my. you still have quite a lofty manner.” Li Siya sat on the chair, and casually played with a knife–Wen Desi recognised that it was actually that large folding knife that he usually carried around.

”But Shopkeeper Wen, you still have not answered my question. How come Old Wang does not know you?” She looked at Chief Wen, and said tenderly. “Let me put it in simpler terms. Do you want to live out the rest of your life as a man?”

Looking at the knife in her hands, Wen Desi broke out in a cold sweat. Although this girl sounded quite coquettish, when she took action she was probably extremely cruel. To deal with such people he couldn’t be too soft or too firm. He had only mentioned a surname Wang, but never specified exactly which Wang it was. He had heard from Xiao Zishan that the smuggling groups on Youyuzhou are very closed off, and outsiders can’t pry in. He sneered in his heart: this girl was just putting on a show like the ‘golden bell move’ in martial arts demonstrations.^[7]

“I don’t know any Old Wang in particular, I just heard that his surname was Wang.” To dull his tone a little, he also smiled, “We are from overseas, and only know how to sell goods and make money. We don’t ask too many questions.”

“You really have only silver in your black eyes.”

“Sorry, sorry. It’s the basic nature of ordinary merchants like us to only seek profit.”

“But how come I feel that Shopkeeper Wen and your men are all extraordinary?” Li Siya leaned closer, and Wen Desi could even taste the faint scent of perfume, “Profit? Who in this world does not seek profit? Even the emperor himself is only seeking profit for his family.” Her eyes turned to stare into his eyes, “Shopkeeper Wen, am I right?”

“Yes, yes, Miss Li said it well.” Wen Desi began to doubt whether this girl was a time traveller. If she was, then he hoped that she wasn’t a fujoshi…^[8] While he was daydreaming, he saw that the pretty girl Li Siya^[9] had sat upright and was arranging a bunch of things dumped on the table. All of it was random items, including even Xiao Zishan’s socks and Wang Gong’s pen. The common feature of all the stuff was that they didn’t come from this time.

“Are these all made in Australia?”

“Yes.”

Then this graceful beauty actually picked up Xiao Zishan’s nylon socks.^[10] She obviously knew what this thing was, as she used a bamboo stick to handle them.

“These socks. How are they made? How is this silk knitted? How can they be so transparent and also so stretchy?”

“These are knitted socks, made using a knitting machine.” Wen Desi was very familiar with modern machinery. The first hand-cranked knitting machine was invented in Britain in 1598. It could only handle 16 needles at a time and was quite primitive. This happened only 30 years ago, and so he estimated that maybe even the Portuguese did not know about this invention.^[11]

“It’s made by a machine?” The girl inspected Xiao Zishan’s socks thoughtfully.

“Yes.”

“But what about this thread? Raw silk can’t be so elastic.”

Wen Desi thought about it, and realised that this sock was too hard to explain. How could he describe a knitting machine? Could he tell her that the material was made from oil? If he told the whole truth his lower body would probably end up missing a certain part.

“This thing is made from nylon thread, not silk thread. The exact production method is a secret of our country, and us merchants don’t know.”

Li Siya nodded, but there was a look of disappointment in her eyes. Wen Desi’s heart moved. It would be a travesty against nature if there weren’t a pair of long stockings on this pretty girl’s thighs. It seemed that in the future they should bring a lot of nylon stockings over…

“It seems that the way you write in Australia is also Western. This pen doesn’t need to be dipped in ink, making it very convenient to use.” Li Siya sighed. She was fiddling with the ballpoint pen, as if she didn't want to let it go. “Your goods really make me feel like I’m at the bottom of a well and looking up at the sky. I didn’t expect that there would be a place in the world that can make such ingenious and intricate things.”

“Not at all, not at all. We are but humble merchants”

“Your trip this time opened up the sea route to Guangzhou. Will you be trading all year round in the future?”

“This…” Wen Desi didn’t know how to answer.

“Hmph, it doesn’t matter anyway.” The girl interrupted. She smiled coldly, as if she were talking to herself, “It’s only a matter of time before the seas of Guangdong fall into the grasp of the boss. If you want to keep your ships and cargo safe, you better wake up and submit to the inevitable!”

After that she got up and left.

[TN]

I personally don’t like using terms in narration that are anachronistic, as I feel it detracts from the immersion. However, in this novel, Boaster frequently uses internet slang. To render these terms, I really only have two choices:

1. Translate their meaning into another language (especially Japanese as the influence of japanese media is as profound in Chinese internet as it is in the English-speaking world)

2. Leave as is, and explain with a footnote

I will try to be closer to the text and generally use the latter option.

---

1. A type of japanese sword ↩︎

2. A chinese set phrase, 好汉不吃眼前亏 ↩︎

3. A different Wang than the surname of Boss Wang that's interrogating Wen Desi. You might recall this figure from the earlier chapters. ↩︎

4. A special type of chinese top, called ao. ↩︎

5. A curtsy. But surely you didn’t need me to explain ↩︎

6. 礼崩乐坏 ↩︎

7. A type of martial arts skill. https://baike.baidu.com/item/%E9%87%91%E9%92%9F%E7%BD%A9/1486632 ↩︎

8. A Japanese term referring to a girl who enjoys BL (Boy’s Love). The chinese is a phonetic translation of the Japanese word. ↩︎

9. Original reads ‘Li MM’. MM is online slang for ‘美眉’, meaning ‘pretty girl’, hence the rendering in english. ↩︎

10. My man was wearing this. I thought only old people did. ↩︎

11. The specific knitting machine in question was called a stocking frame. This invention, along with other fabric manufacturing machines, really heralded the start of the industrial revolution. ↩︎